Incompatibilities Exist Because We Want Them To
Incompatibilities exist within all relationships. It’s often what makes them very special. There are versions of our internal struggle, trauma, pain, inner turmoil, that when activated, sometimes project spitefulness, immaturity, right fighting, vengefulness and aggression towards others to create a state of contraction, often perceived as discomfort to all parties involved.
It may seem very personal, however those in need of such expressions willfully invite these reactions from any antenna available to receive them. So we can take it personally, or not, but recognizing the process better allows us to mitigate a reaction based on fear and a response based on our own patterns of pain which are being highlighted. That is after all why we are experiencing it, and we have willing teachers there to show us why.
We engage in these expressions as long as necessary and at some point they will and do transition. The time it takes is irrelevant. Until that moment arrives, we will play and those inviting us to play will appreciate the exchange, whether conscious or subconscious to fulfill the contracted state so that expansion may set in. It’s a cycle and it continues as long as there are participants.
Many people have been so accustomed to relationships they can emotionally manipulate and impose on, that it has become second nature when the going gets tough and they then use their past experience to express their patterns to others. Their state of being reflects it and we feel it from them. They usually come from marriages or cohabitation scenarios where they communicate the same consciousness and if we observe them in their environment, with their friends, their families and many of their relationships, we see the same behaviors repeating over and over. It’s a pattern replicated wherever necessary and presents as a very apparent state of dysfunction which ultimately is thriving for function, and so behaviors will reflect this reality in every relationship that is being encouraged at some level.
What is perceived as “bad” habits are developed through automated unconscious processing. Bad is just a perspective and varies according to the discomfort being experienced. Eventually the manifestation of these habits creates stress, fallout, distancing, anger, frustration and eventually the relationship may not be worth the time or effort. You may choose to love them from a distance to curb a state of insanity. Vibration and resonance then shifts and new connections will form. Old patterns may reemerge or not depending on how we shift our consciousness.
When antagonism, struggle and rejection are experienced, some will resort to a default reptilian-based mindset which thrives on survival where they must attack to escape what is perceived as danger. It’s strictly a “kill or be killed” type mentality and the protection measures are very reactionary. It gets the best of us at times and we project that pain onto others without thinking about the consequences. We are not concerned at that moment about consequences. We want to avoid danger to our emotional and very fragile state. This becomes priority number one.
The hallmark of incompatibilities within relationships of this kind result from behaviors which avoid personal responsibility, promoting the cause as others being the problem rather than looking within our own state of dysfunction to discover why discomfort continues. Avoiding this introspection allows us to continue the cycle of contraction, hurt, pain, so that other modes deeply woven in our psychological matrix of ego can be further explored with those who can assist us in this expression. When all players have left the game all we are left with is our own sense of what we have created for ourselves.