The Grizzly Bear

I went to camp out in the wilderness beside a female Grizzly Bear for almost a month. I was totally off the grid. But the big fur ball took my cell phone and broke it into pieces, ate the antenna whole and left. It took me over three weeks to put that darn cell phone back together because I kept tracking the bear and looking for any of its feces to retrieve the antenna. A few days before my departure date I found the antenna in a pile of feces, and put the phone back together. Then I realized the battery was dead. When I caught up the next day with the bear by a stream, she looked up at me casually, with an expression of indifference as she was drinking water. Her cub was beside her drinking at the time. As I approached she didn't flinch even though she knew I was approaching her cub, then suddenly she made eye contact with me and had the audacity to just trot away with her cub like our incident never happened .

I was astonished and so angry the bear paid me no attention after what she did. I solely blame the bear for killing my battery and my cell phone, eating my antenna and for putting me in danger by destroying the only communication device I had to call for help. When I got back to my car just one mile away, I immediately called my lawyer to launch a lawsuit against the bear and the court case ended up lasting three months with all my testimony against the bear. I requested an initiative that all plants wherever bears are living and subsist on, should be sprayed with a laxative to accelerate the digestion of bears to ensure ingestion of anything foreign to nature is excreted quickly so it can be easily retrievable within a short period of time. And second requested for the removal of the bear and its habitat so this bear and no other bears will ever do this to anybody else again. I lost the initial court case, appeal and then lost again in Supreme Court because they said the Bear couldn't provide evidence. I am currently running for office in my local chapter to change laws so that "regardless of a bear's evidence" this kind of thing never happens again to anybody.

The Bear Says: Have compassion and tolerance when interacting with humans, especially if they don’t haven’t the slightest clue how you function.